āFor if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sinsā (Matt. 6:14-15). Jesusā teaching in this passage is tricky to understand. Is he saying that God forgives our sins only if we first forgive others? Doesnāt this attach conditions to Godās grace? Our church confessions state unequivocally that Godās grace āis free to save sinners who offer nothing ...ā (Our World Belongs to God, 26). It does seem, though, that Jesus is saying the opposite: we must offer somethingānamely, forgivenessāto others in order to receive for ourselves Godās gracious forgiveness.
As a Reformed Christian, I cling to the unconditionality of Godās grace, by which my sins are forgiven. We love because we were first loved (1 John 4:19), and we can forgive only because weāve already been forgiven. In our Reformed tradition, the āoughtāāwhat I should doāfollows the āisāāwho I am through the death and resurrection of Jesus. Godās grace is not conditional. Rather, it creates the conditions by which we are able to forgive our friends and enemies. But while itās not conditional, grace is costly and demanding, and probably nowhere more than in the matter of forgiveness.
For that reason we should be careful not to allow our theology to make a passage like Matthew 6:14-15 easy for us! No doubt about it, this is one of Jesusā hard teachings. Here he insists that redeemed lives inevitably show grace. We must forgive as weāve been forgiven. And if we donāt? Jesusā warning is earnest. If we donāt show grace by forgiving others, then perhaps we donāt know Godās saving grace in the first place. Or perhaps, just as the law and prophets in the Old Testament warned Israel that covenant grace still demanded costly obedience (Deut. 15:12-15, e.g.), Jesusā remarks are meant foremost to rattle those of us whoāve experienced Godās grace but balk at offering it to others because it is so difficult.
I was recently reminded of the costly, difficult nature of forgiveness in a conversation on campus with a thoughtful Muslim student. As we chatted, she raised the matter of forgiveness, which for Muslims is celebrated as an attribute of Allah and commanded for his followers. She had trouble, however, with the Christian teaching that God forgives sinners on the basis of the death of Jesus ChristāGod is free, after all, and shouldnāt need a sacrifice in order to forgive. She also wasnāt comfortable with the teaching in the New Testament that forgiveness should be offered beyond our own community even to our enemies.
I pointed out to her that Christians grasp the concept of forgiveness through the cross, by which God forgave his enemies at enormous cost to Godās self (Rom. 5:10). Christians admit, then, that forgiving others, especially our enemies, comes at great cost to our honor and comfort, and it demands that we sacrifice our claims to personal retribution. I suggested that in a sense forgiving others āechoesā the costly grace by which God forgives us in Christ.
She wasnāt convinced, but she understood my point. When Jesus says, āif you do not forgive others ā¦ your Father will not forgive your sins,ā heās insisting that Godās children must forgive the wrongs and evil done to them, even by our enemies. This is a difficult act of discipleship. It echoes the astonishingly costly grace and sacrificial love by which God has forgiven us in Christ.
āNothing comes cheap or easy to us that was costly to God,ā wrote Dietrich Bonhoeffer in his classic The Cost of Discipleship. Indeed, forgiving others as Christ commands us might very well be impossible except for the Spirit of the forgiving God dwelling in us.
About the Author
Todd Statham is the Christian Reformed chaplain at the University of British Columbia (Okanagan Campus) and a research fellow at the Kirby Laing Centre for Public Theology in Cambridge.